identity.

It usually hasn't bothered me before, but nowadays I'm wondering what I AM.
Through high school, I just decided that I WAS and disregarded the "race" thing. I checked black when I filled out forms, and I cringed at the black jokes my friends made.
However, when I'd bring up my discomfort at these jokes, one said, "It's okay. You're not black, you're Kenyan."
I wondered why that made it ok, and why I couldn't stand up when people where being rude and derogatory. As a first generation American citizen, do I have no right to stop disrespect when I see it? Since my family hasn't been through slavery, does that make me exempt from racist remarks and racialization?
If I try untangling my identity, I send like a milk carton: 50% Kenyan, 25% Malian, 25% Mexican, but with French and American citizenship and a father who's a French native. I usually end up saying "My mom's Kenyan and my dad's French." and I save the rest for when I have time to explain it. The thing is, my dad probably identifies more with his French identity than with his Malian or Mexican one...he barely speaks Spanish but speaks French fluently, and was born and raised there. My mom is 100% Kenyan, and I look just like here, so people assume I'm African American-but I'm not EXACTLY. I guess I'm 75% African and 25% Mexican (I swear it all went to my hair...) I can't really say Kenyan-American though, that's just half of me. It's just confusing-I'm going to have to pick one thing and stick to it. I think I'll just check in the "multiracial" or "prefer not to answer" box from now on. If people don't believe me then whatever, son!
Oh, and I'm tired of the "WHATEVER YOU'RE HUMAN" stuff. I know I'm human, shoot me if I want to find out more about myself.

They say us college students overbook ourselves.

Tomorrow:
10-11. Breakfast. Read Black identities.
11-1230. Start houellbecq essay.
1230(or 1) to 4. Process, read black identities during drying, try contact sheet and maybe a print or two.
4-5. Review geo structures, redo the test thing.
5- CHILL OUT and check on prints.
6:30-??? CAO Spring concert.
???-9ish-Read/chill
10-2 Work.
Sunday:
11-12 Read BI and eat breakfast
12-4 Darkroom!
4-6 Watch movie for French/ meet for skit?
7-10 Dance rehearsal
10-12ish read more BI, GEO and chill OUT.

Forever Alone may not be so bad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7X7sZzSXYs

Richburg RANT

I'm reading a book for class about African American's voyages back to Africa-one of these people's names is Keith Richburg and he makes me VERY ANGRY.
Richburg is a reporter for the Washington Post who went to East Africa while Somalia's government (or lack thereof) was undergoing great trouble with warring clans and famine. Richburg quickly grew frustrated with Africa, claiming that Africans were "self-destructive" and "backwards", and even praising South Africa's apartheid regime, saying it looked almost American with its shopping malls and paved roads. Richburg had the gall to go to Goree, a site of slave transport in Dakar, Senegal, and praise the Africans who left centuries ago (in chains) leaving their backwards brothers behind.
*deep breath*
RICHBURG YOU ARE AN IDIOT! By making broad generalizations about the African condition, by not going over the history of the places you were studying, by insulting African women (calling them "easy") and by praising a racist regime, you made an absolute fool of yourself (imho).
However, this also goes to show that it's impossible to report on something without putting your own twist onto it. Unfortunately, Richburg's twist was ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS.
Journalism isn't about putting down some people and praising others. Journalism isn't about persuasion. Journalism is about exposure, exposure of problems in society, humans rights issues, corrupt politicians, environmental problems, and any injustice in this world! (And a myriad of other things!)
GAH!
Of course he'd be a reporter for the Washington Post (it's so conservative).

It's a rainy afternoon. 8 students pile into a van and are driven to a random spot on the side of a highway. With umbrellas on hand, they exit the van and stare at rocks for an hour.
Yeah geo field trips!
I find the class to be somewhat unexciting, but being able to describe the history of an area by looking at rocks is kind of awesome.

Things that are good:
-Sent visa form/got plane ticket to China
-Got plane ticket home
-School's wrapping up, no exams
-Frisbee is awesome, scored my first point a week or two ago and a week later I LAID OUT (got dirt on my shirt to prove it). Also sky'd someone and scored, am now called YAZZ hands. (yazzmataz. yazzercise. I like it)
-Gonna get paid a lot for spring concert! And i have another new job.
Things that are not good:
-Geo exam grade (argh!)
-Paper/project this week
-The weather
-Having to work spring concert

happy

tourney tomorrow.
party tonight.
good music right now.
life=good.

hell week (1)

so this is what hell week feels like.
i've got a photo assignment due thursday that I spent 5 hours working on today.
i have a geo exam on friday that i haven't studied enough for considering my last grade.
i have two books to read this week.
i have ultimate and quiz bowl and think and a study session and things to photograph and amidst all this i have to find time to eat, and to SLEEP.
good golly almighty!